Being A Mother

You'll never fully understand your mom unless you become a mom.

It is thirty minutes past twelve midnight and I am still awake... sleepy, but trying to be awake.  My son is sick so I have to be up until 1 in the morning to give him his medicine for fever.  I am not as worried now compared last night when his fever went up to 39.5 degrees Celsius, he would wake up after only minutes of sleeping and would call me as if I am missing.

I am a mom for two years now and I guess I am now into full understanding of what my mom used to tell me when I was younger.  I grew up in my great grandmother's household, my mom and I never had a chance to be together for a long time.  She works in the US since I was a child, she would go the Philippines every three years and stay for two weeks or so to be with us.  Despite the distance, she never failed to give us advice about life and some sermon about how hard it is to raise a child.  I value everything that my mother told me, more so now that I am a mother.

My son and I went through a lot, I never knew he would be as fragile when he was born.  On his third month, we would bring her to a specialist to check the progress of his condition... not fatal, but alarming enough to make me cry every night.  I couldn't bring him to the park or any place that is crowded because his medicine, although treating his condition, makes his immune system down.  That went on until his first birthday.  He rarely gets sick, as opposed to what his doctor warned us.  Thinking about all the precautions of his medical condition put me into a lot of stress but like what my mom told me... be strong for your child.

He got sick on Sunday night, he woke up in the middle of the night already feverish.  I gave him medicine to lower his temperature and fell asleep again.  We woke up late, I wasn't able to go to work because his nanny is on leave.  Although feeling unwell, he played and ate like he's not sick at all.  Maybe, just like me, he is a fighter too.

He suddenly woke up while I was watching him sleep, he looked at me in the eye, touched my cheeks and gave me a smile... after that, he went back to sleep.  Moments like that...priceless.